Fladlien Productions

Hello,

Just got back from the Mass Control event in San Diego. It was pretty good. Got to meet some of my long time clients and friends like Dale Maxwell and Lance Tamashiro.

The night before the event, I got a special invite to hang out for two hours with John Carlton, who is probably one of the top five living copywriters of all time.

I got this invite because I bought through his affiliate link.  40 other people did. Only 4 people actually showed up and
I was one of them.  John has been like a mentor to me. I stalked his ads. Memorized parts of them word for word. I use his examples all the time in my coaching classes. So it was great to be able to meet a “legend” in person.

John is so respected that even other big name guys wanted to see him. So when I came up to the room, Bob Serling was already there (he spoke at Kern’s event) and Harlan Kilstein hung out for an hour (Kilstein also spoke at the event). Rich Schefren’s right hand man and business partner, Brian Johnson was there as well, as where a few other big names.

And then there was little old me.

I got to talk with John personally for about 30 minutes. He found me pretty intriguing, especially when I told him I had written over 50 sales letters in a year and pretty much all of them were good.

He wanted me to promote his stuff as an affiliate right away, ha!

Anyways, there is a point to all this. The point is that two years ago I was some nerd who knew all about John Carlton, but didn’t even belong in the city as him, much less the same hotel room. Two years ago I did not have ONE sales letter to show for my efforts. And the idea of dropping 2k to get into the conference, 1k on the ticket, and 1k on the hotel room would’ve probably made me throw up, considering that would have been the equivalent of 3 months of pay back then.

My have the times changed. I did it by mastering 3things.  First, I mastered persuasive writing. Then product creation.  Then focus – so I can do both of those things constantly, day in an day out, and at an unbelievable speed.

In this business, sometimes it’s not about the money, but to be able to transform yourself from worshiping an ideal to earning their respect. That means a lot. And it should be a motivator for you to press on, and to take it to the next level.

It’s worth it. I can now speak from experience.

Thanks,
Jason “one legged golfer” Fladlien

Recently I wrote a blog post talking about 4 out of the 10  types of headlines I use when writing my email copy, sales copy or any time I need a really good headline.

People loved that blog post, and wanted to know what the  other six were. So here they are:

Instant Gratification

This is BY FAR, my go to headline. Give people a quick  solution to a desperate problem, and often times that’s all you need.

The simple formula is “How to do [a specific solution they desire] in [a very specific time frame]…”

For example:

“How to write a 400 word article in 7 minutes or less, including proof reading and research” for my 7 minute article product.

Or…

“How to write near world class copy in 3 hours or less” for my copywriting success shorcut system.

Or…

How to fin a profitable niche… create a 24.7% converting squeeze page… a magic solution product… and 1% sales copy… all in one sitting” for the niche invasion system product I did with Lance Tamashiro.

5 times out of 7, this is the first headline I go to, and when in doubt, this is the one I fall back on.

Dramatic Demonstration Of Proof

Once for an email, I wrote a headline that said “Me and this guy created 72 products in 2008″ to promote Product University.

Another time I created a headline that said “I bet with $100 of my own money I can show you how to create a product in 48 hours or less” for my 48 hour report product. This time I combined instant gratification with proof.

One of the best examples I saw was a headline that I believe Gary Halbert created for Robert Allen that said “Drop me off in any US city, only give me money for food, and in 72 I’ll buy you a prime piece of real estate with no money down”.

Another example: Claude Hopkins one time wrote a headline that said “These 7 questions about yeast were asked 683 times” or something to that effect (going by memory here).

The most famous example was by one of the greatest advertisers of all time, David Olgilvy, who said “At 60 miles an hour, the loudest sound you here is the ticking of the clock…”.

If you have a dramatic way of demonstrating your claims, you should consider using that in a headline.

The Story

To tell a story, you only need three things… a character (or characters), where they were at, and where they’re at now. That’s it. Watch how you can transform this into a headline…

How A Former Chicago Bears Cheerleader Partnered With Two Young Nerds Who Did $160,000 In The Last 3 Months To Share
With You… The Ultimate FREE One Day Workshop On Invading & Dominating ANY Niche In 7 Days Or Less!

It’s a headline I created for a workshop I’m doing in Orlando at the end of the month with Robert Plank & Mary Wilhite.

I got this from John Carlton, who once wrote a headline that said:

Crippled Golfer Stuns L.A. Open Crowd By Crawling From Death Bed To Beat 110 Pro Golfers With a 67 (Using A Short Backswing) And Qualify For The Last Spot In The Famous 2002 Tournament!

One time in a copywriting class, I came up with a headline for one of my students, Elisabeth Kuhn, which said:

“Former Breast Cancer Survivor Stranded Over Seas Was Forced To Discover Simple But Effective Cures For Stress”.

In each of those example, you notice there is a character (former bears cheerleader, crippled golfer, breast cancer survivor), where they were at (on death bed, stranded over seas, “did 160k in last 3 months) and where they are at now (qualify for the last spot in us open, stress relief master, holding an amazing free workshop).

Simple stuff.

Predicting The Future

We all love to speculate in the future. Sometimes those make the greatest headlines.

Here are some great examples:

“What the wolverine leak means for the future of piracy…”

“8 ways the future of gaming is being reinvented”

“Imagine pinpoints brain regions that ’see the future’

“10 skills developers will need in the next 5 years”

“Are paperless receipts the future in Retail?”

Offer

If you have an unbelievable offer, you should put it in the headline. I did that in the above “former chicago bears cheerleader” example, when I combined the story with the offer.

Here’s another example: “Why two sick bastards are offering 43 of their own personal tools for only $7″. I created this for an offer at twosickbastards.com.

We liked it so much we did it again at themrrclub.com when I came up with the headline “Master Resale Rights, Private Label Rights & More To 81 Products For Only $7″.

Combo

The last technique I use is a bit anti-climatic because I’ve already demonstrated it to you – combining these different techniques together. Once you have chosen one angle to work for a headline, why not add in a second? For example, after I wrote “how to write an article in 7 minutes or less including proof reading and research” I immediately followed it up with a “proof” subhead. I combine story with incongruent juxtaposition all the time. Etc.

So, quick recap on the ten types of headliens to use:

1. Anger
2. Challenging conventional wisdom
3. promise of little known information
4. incongruent juxtaposition
5. instant gratifcation
6. proof
7. Story
8. Predicting the future
9. Offer
10. Combination of the above

There you have it. Once you master these ten types of headlines, you’ll never want for another headline again.

Please share your thoughts by leaving a comment.

-Jason

Yesterday, April 7th, was my birthday. I spent it doing everything I love to do… I conducted two webinars,  did an hour and a half “follow up” video recording for our members at http://videosalestactics.com, and conducted two personal one-on-one coaching sessions.

I still had time stop by my mom’s and visit her… cook a gourmet vegetarian pizza and eat carrot cake and open gifts with her.

One gift I got was this hideous, ugly looking 1970’s Monster figurine that when you switched a button, it would growl and its eyes would light up red. It’s literally the ugliest toy I’ve ever seen. And it’s what I gave my brother Ryan for Christmas (we had a weird sense of humor toward each other).

Little did I know the next day he comes out of his room and tells my mom, “We’re giving that to Jason for his birthday!” My heart strings were already being tugged.

The other two gifts I got were a book Ryan made for school and a lock of his Ryan’s hair, which I didn’t know my mom had. When I saw the hair, I immediately begin to cry. I remember when Ryan was sick, I’d always rub his head and touch his hair.

I sat and cried pitifully for 10 minutes. Then I felt better. I then went home and gave one of the best webinars of my life with Robert Plank for our video sales tactics members. Then, right after the almost 3 hour webinar, we hopped back on the call and recorded additional content for our members.

Robert kept saying through the recording that I was in a particularly good mood. I was. I can’t explain it. After I cried, I just felt better. Like Ryan was there to comfort me. Then I went to sleep last night and I had all sorts of wonderful dreams with him in it.

All in all – it was the best birthday I’ve ever had.

I also go a present from a client of mine who has become a very close friend. It was an email. It was a very touching email about how much positive impact I’ve had on his life, and his family’s life. My life purpose has always been to leave a positive impact on the people I meet, and to get a response like that, written from the heart, was the icing on my birthday cake.

I got to do everything I loved doing on my birthday… I spent about 12 hours yesterday delivering value in the form of information that will help people better their life. I spent time with my family. I got great presents from clients. And I really felt like my brother was right there with me.

Now as I reflect on this, I realize: Even if it wasn’t my birthday, I would’ve spent the day exactly the same way. I simply love what I do. That’s the real secret to my productivity. I love the opportunities that my business makes available to me.

And it’s no accident it’s happened this way. It was through deliberate cultivation of habits and skill. It was the unwillingness to settle for anything less than what I knew I was capable of. It was having the knowledge to experience the pain of discipline now, knowing that it hurts far less than the pain of regret…

My message for you is simple: please make today special. Every day really is a gift, as wishy washy as that sounds. If today was your birthday, what would you be doing? You should live at least part of everyday like it was your birthday.

Because in a way it kind of is… every day is the birth of a new opportunity to bring you one step closer to achieving what you were destined to achieve.

Thoughts?

What’s the trick for staying motivated? Well, the better you feel, the better you do. Here are some techniques I use to feel good as much as possible.

Schedule In Gratitude

Gratitude is not something that comes easily for most of us. We take for granted A LOT. That’s why you have to make it a conscious habit to remember to be grateful for things. For months I used to wake up every single morning, and for the first 5 minutes of the day I’d say out loud what I’m grateful for.

You get what you  focus on. If you focus on all you have, you’ll get more of it. Here’s a fun challenge – create a list of 1000 things you’re grateful for. I did. It was amazing how easy it was to come up with over a 1000 things to be grateful for – most of which are taken for granted.

Break Limiting Metaphors

Listen to the metaphors people use. It’s usually a window into the images in their mind. If someone says I’m at the end of my rope, they are creating an image in their mind of that metaphor why they are saying it. Even if just for a split second. But it’s there. I don’t like to have limiting images in my mind at all.

I’m never at the end of my rope. I have a long rope. I never “burn the candle from both ends”. Instead, I “try to touch the sky’s ceiling…”. I’m not “drop dead exhausted”. I just need to “recharge my batteries”.

A casual use of metaphors is dangerous. Learn to identify the ones you use, and if those metaphors aren’t useful, don’t use them anymore.

Fall In Love With Opportunity

I don’t think you should always love what you do. In fact, some times you should hate what you do… but love the opportunities it will open up for you if you do it. Even a ditch digger has something to look forward to. Digging ditches takes care of supporting himself. That gives him the opportunity to use his spare time to cultivate new skills, so he can do more than just dig ditches.

Challenge gives you the opportunity to become more.

Every task you have to do – before doing it, link it to at least one juicy opportunity it will open up for you once you’re done with the task.

Live A More Congruent Lifestyle

I see a lot of people who want to be rich have, within themselves, conflicting views about wealth. That’s like driving a car with one foot on the gas and the other on the brake. There are some issues to deal with when it comes to wealth. What is the difference between wealth and greed? What is the cost you pay to become wealthy?

These are things you have to deal with. And not bringing out all these challenge points, and coming up with congruent conclusions for them, as they relate to your identity, can be your down fall.

What is the mental image you have of yourself? Is it in congruence with the actions you take on a day to day basis? If not, you have to reconcile that, otherwise you’re always going to in conflict as you try to move toward your goals.

In a sales letter, your headline is usually the second most important element, behind your offer. In email marketing and article marketing, you’re headline is everything. 4 out of 5 people will read your article based on the headline alone. Mess it up, and you miss 80% of your audience.

I’m going to share with you some different types of headlines I’ve found that do their job – which is to capture attention, and then get the reader to dive into your message.

Headline 1: The Fed Makes It Official – They Are Monetizing Debt

I call this an “anger headline”. What makes it so effective is it brings up an emotional response in you – that other, more powerful people are taking advantage of your precarious position. You want to read on because you’re pissed. Notice this is a NON-BENEFIT orientated headline.

My research has found that for email marketing and article marketing, non-benefit orientated headlines, in general, out pull your typical “hit them over the head with a million benefits” headlines. I don’t know why, but I’d guess it’s because we’ve grown immune to big benefit headlines.

When I run through  my mental filing cabinet searching for a headline, one drawer I open up is the “anger headlines”. Is there a way I can tap into a subject that causes an emotional rise out of my reader?

Headline 2: Why It’s Okay For Newspapers To Die

I call this a “challenging conventional wisdom” headline. Most people you hear are talking about how the Internet is going to ruin newspapers, and usually the implication is that this is a bad thing. This headline openly challenges that. You just have to read on to see the rationale behind.

Again, notice this is a NON-BENEFIT orientated headline. One time, in a stroke of brilliance, I came up with this headline: “The 80/20 Rule Sucks”. The same technique. Makes you want to read on to see the rationale behind it, doesn’t it? (you can at http://imtimemanagement.com)

Headline 3: What Is The Most Dangerous Country In the World Today?

I call this a “promise of little known information” headline. You want to read on to find out the answer to that question, so you can casually drop it into your “water cooler” talk. Plus, the implication is that it’s not the countries you think it would be (implicitness is a powerful copywriting tool., but requires you walk a fine line).

Do you have some interesting factoid? Maybe you could twist it into a headline for your next article, email or sales letter.

Headline 4: Man Arrested For Trying To Smuggle Woman In Speaker Box

I call this an “incongruent juxtaposition” headline. Two elements that don’t belong together are somehow tied together. These are your “national enquirer” type headlines, and boy do they work. Your brain is developed to notice unique stimuli in your environment around you. It’s a survival mechanism. It’s also a great way to get attention. And if you do so in a way that really makes them curious as to “why the heck..?”, even better.

For example, I one time wrote an ad that started off with “How A Former Monk Went From $0 to $50,000 In 6 Months With Internet Marketing…” (you can read the story at http://internetmillionairerecipe.com)

Anyway, that’s it for today . The real takeaway is how I have these different types of headlines “filed” in my mind. When I write a headline, it always comes from my master list of 10 different types of headlines. (I’ve given you 4 above). I literally just run through this list (I’ve done it so many times, it’s just a part of me now) and I use the technique – or combination of techniques – that best fit the current situation.

I usually write my headlines in one draft, and in 5 minutes or less.

Have you used any of these headline writing techniques in your business? And what do you think of them? Please leave a comment to this blog post.

Here’s some stuff I’ve done over the last 5 days…

I wrote 52 articles for a new membership site I’ll be launching soon
Created 28 videos for that membership site
Did 3 webinars
Wrote a sales letter
Did 4 personal coaching sessions (I’m always baffled more people don’t come to me for coaching…)
And some other stuff I’m forgetting

And of those 5 days, I took Sunday off completely. I only put in 20 minutes that day.

Now here’s what this “all action” attitude has been able to do for me:

Monday I went down and donated $500 dollars to a memorial that my Brother’s school is creating for him. They are going to plant a tree and next to it put a plaque with his name on it. This donation came from all the wonderful people who have participated in my Tribute Series (www.instantcontentcreation.com/Ryantribute)

Then Wednesday, I paid $3,000 for my mom and Ryan’s step dad to get new cabinets and cupboards.

As you read this, I’m now on a plane heading to Texas for the AM 2.0 Internet marketing seminar in Dallas (If you’re going to be there, make sure to say hi to me!). Over a grand for this trip.

The point of this is simple: you can’t do one without the other. You put in time to your business so you can give more of yourself outside of your business.

That’s my big motivator. It’s no secret I get a ton of stuff done (that’s why I created a time management product – http://imtimemanagement.com). And I know all the techniques. All the mental trickery. All the motivation strategies.

That’s all fine and good, but sometimes all you need is a kick in the ass to get going. And today’s blog is that kick in the ass for you.

Here’s my challenge to you. I want you to do MORE today than you were planning on doing. If you were going to write 5 articles today, write 6. If you were going to write a blog post today, write another and auto-schedule it for sometime in the future.

Want to know the best time management secret for getting stuff done? It’s accountability. What’s that “extra” thing you’re going to do today. You should write it down and make the commitment. In fact, do it as a response to this blog.

If I can do all those things I listed above in 5 short days, surely you can do just one more thing today to get closer to whatever your goal is. So post a comment and let me know what it is… and then go and do it.

The “Power of 4″ Guarantee

Almost every sales letter I write mentions my guarantee in at least 4 separate places. Usually, as soon as the offer is mentioned, I tie it to a guarantee. I also create a “guarantee section” with its own subhead and a whole chunk of copy dedicated to it.

I re-iterate the guarantee on the order form, and if I include P.S.’s, I mention the guarantee there as well.

A good rule of thumb to follow is that your sales letter should mention something about your guarantee in at least 4 separate, distinct parts of your copy.

The little-known “Third Headline”

The goal of a headline is to get people to read the opening paragraph. The goal of a subhead is to continue to keep them reading, to provide eye relief, and to “write for the skimmers”.

There is another type of headline though – it’s the first sentence in each of your paragraphs.

Occasionally you want to “sell” your reader on reading the next paragraph. So you want sprinkle in paragraphs the start off like this…

Now get this….
Let’s move a bit closer to the truth…
That’s only half the story though…
Here’s a neat little trick…
What’s next?

And so on. I actually created a swipe file for this because it’s that important. (By the way, you can get it at http://www.twosickbastards.com — it’s the report called “Power Transitions”).

By adding that little extra sentence to the beginning of the paragraph, you’re promising the reader something worthwhile and in their benefit. That’s good for keeping their eyes glued to your ad.

The “Close A Day” Routine

I don’t advocate you study a lot of copywriting. Instead, it’s much better to learn by DOING. One great exercise is to go through your swipe file everyday until you find one or two paragraphs that you consider brilliant copywriting.

Then, type out that paragraph over and over again in a word document. After that good warm up write some of your own copy, either for a letter you’re working on… a new letter… or a tweak to an existing letter.

“Cliff Notes” A Sales Letter

In my Gary Halbert Swipe File package (www.halbertswipefile.com) what I did was took 6 of Halbert’s ad, and stripped them bare.

For example, he might open up with some dramatic proof element, and then transition it to hit the prospects 4 biggest sources of frustration. After that, he’d launch into a list of bullet points, then present the offer, give the guarantee…

And so that’s how I’d cliff-note the ad. I’d literally say…

“Start out with dramatic proof to get their attention. Then transition it to agitate their three biggest problems. Next, get them excited for a solution by offering some incredible benefits…”

The above exercise made me really good at creating “flow” in my letters, to the point I can now organize a sales letter in my head.

Use “Positive Phrasing” As Much As Possible

One line I hate to see in a piece of copy – “Don’t delay, act today!” Why? Because it uses the work DELAY. I don’t want my prospect to even have that work pop into his mind when he’s reading my copy.

The mind typically processes things only in positives. Don’t think of yourself driving in a fancy sports car. I would bet most of you reading this just did. Even though I told you “Don’t”. Your mind just hears “fancy sports car” and it’s off creating pictures.

If you put a line like this in your copy: “This isn’t some crappy , rehashed guru product…” you run the risk of your prospect making a picture in their mind of your product AS a crappy, rehashed guru product.

I make these mistakes myself from time to time… It DOES happen. But as much as possible, when you’re reading through your copy and “smoothing it out” before putting it out in public, try to use positive phrasing such as “you should act now” instead of “don’t delay, act today” and “this product has its own unique twist” instead of “this isn’t some crappy, rehashed guru product”.

What’s your thoughts on these 5 techniques? Do you use them already in your copy? If not, when are you going to start?

Please leave your answer as comment.

-Jason

So I bought mass control 2.0 for the nice sum of $2,000. I wanted to explain to you WHY I made this purchase, what I think of this course, and also some “hidden lessons” about these high ticket items that I think you will find extremely instructive.

This is also a “no-punches” pulled review, with no particular slant or hidden agenda of any kind. I am going to be particularly candid about my thoughts, as I always am, so you’re going to get some insights from me you probably won’t get anywhere else.

Enough preamble, let’s do it.

First, here’s WHY I bought mass control — ONLY for the bonus. This is instructive for two reasons. First, you should always create attractive bonuses, because that will get you more buyers, plain and simple. Second, the bonus was for a “closed door” workshop in san deigo in 2009.

The content of mass control 2.0 is not that important to me in reality. Sure, I’ll pick up some gems, but I have found a long time ago that once you hit the 100k mark, people become more important in your business than information.

So I bought just so I can meet other people and hopefully set up some relationships with them, that in the future, will result is some profitable business partnerships.

For example, I’ve already lined up some big people for my webinar series to raise funds for my brother Ryan Fladlien, who recently passed away (instantcontentcreation.com/Ryantribute/. Almost everyone I contacted was a person who I had met at a seminar before, and it was much easier to get in touch with them and to work something out.

That’s invaluable.

Now let’s talk about the actual content. Here’s an insight that should help you make smartest purchasing decisions in the future. There is NOT much difference between technique going on here. Frank has a few insights that no one else possesses, but nothing that will dramatically change your business overnight.

That’s because marketing fundamentals are marketing fundamentals, period. The only difference is that Frank engineers the right “conditions” to get the great successes he has. 90% of his techniques you can find out about in most $97 ebooks. The secret is Frank knows the set up.

He finds situations with amazing and interesting proof elements. Great back stories. Special circumstances. Then he applies his formula (it’s mostly email marketing with some free gifts thrown in) and gets fantastic results.

To me, that’s an incredible insight. I didn’t buy this expecting to immediately find some bit of wisdom that would get me a ton of money over night. I bought because I’m a shrewd business person who looks for even the “slightest edge” to enhance my ability to deliver value to the market place.

A 2k investment to me works like this — if it allows me to make a measly $200 more a month, then I’m happy with it because that’s $2400 more a year. And I’ve already applied some of Frank’s stuff to make about $240 in “found money” that I wouldn’t already have made, all from a few minutes of work.

Which leads to another point — it’s not the information that I find valuable, but the ability to easily reference it and “deploy” it. I know most of this stuff already, I just don’t have it as organized as Frank does, so the time he saves me alone is worth it.

Finally, I like to buy 2K products just to see what they look like, how they’re delivered, what happens after I buy, how I’m marketed to on the backend, etc., because I know I’ll pick up one or two big lessons.

So to wrap it all up — will you find any big “mind changing” information in Frank’s mass control that you can’t get anywhere else for much cheaper? Probably NOT. Is his stuff as powerful and mysterious and as easy as it seems? No. But nothing marketed THAT well ever is.

But with the right mindset, it’s a steal for $2,000 because I know I’ll pick up three little things that will make me better at communicating the value of my products… I’ll pick up at least two or three valuable connections in San Diego… I’ll save a few hours each month in time simply because I can reference Frank’s stuff..

So I’m happy with my purchase, but not the reasons most people would think.

What your thoughts on this?

-Jason

My little brother Ryan passed on January 25th, at 6:55 am. I want to share with you his last few hours on earth because they were angelic, infused with love, and offered so much spiritual potency that I felt the deepest connection of love and God on this earth that I have ever experienced.

My brother was a very special little guy. I don’t think he was unhappy one day in his whole life – even after he was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer in July of 2008. And when it was time to go, he was prepared.

He went rather quickly. In fact, just three days before his death he went out to the grocery store, the toy store and other places. Because of chemotherapy, he couldn’t eat chocolate. Just last week I had eaten chocolate in front of him.

He had just gotten off of chemotherapy, and one of the things he wanted to do was to eat chocolate right in front of me!

I went down and seen his Friday. This was when he started to go down hill. He had mom call me earlier in the day because I wasn’t coming down until about 5 pm. He wanted me down sooner. I told him I’d come down earlier. Then mom called back and said “Ryan wants to know exactly when you’ll be down!”

He really wanted to see me. When I came down Friday, he was suffering a bit from headaches, but I figured it was just a minor illness and he’d get better. However, right before I got ready to leave, he got really sick. It was the first time my brother showed signs of losing his battle with cancer.

When he went to sleep, I left and cried for almost the whole 50 minute drive back home. I hated seeing him suffering.

Friday night before bed is when things got real bad for Ryan. He lost his ability to talk and swallow. However, his mind was 100% sharp, and he knew exactly what was going on around him.

I was planning on coming in early Saturday morning at 10 am, because that’s when the hospice nurse was coming. Again, we had no idea Ryan was going to go so quickly. When I got there and saw him, I immediately knew he was on his death bed.

It hurts seeing a child with so little energy that he could barely move. He couldn’t swallow, so all this phlegm was built up in his throat, and when he breathed it sounded like a coffee maker percolating. That sound haunted me for the first few hours.

The saddest part was that he couldn’t talk. He could only nod his head up and down for yes, or left and right for no. We asked if he was in pain. He shook his head no. The hospice nurse took his vital signs and they, too, indicated that he was without pain.

From the time I showed up at 10 am Saturday morning until he passed away early Sunday morning, I was right by his side. So was my mother and Ryan’s step father – he was surrounded by the three people he loved most in the world.

We took him to the hospital to get a line put in his arm, so we could administer his medication at home. A line is more permanent than an IV, you can keep it in for up to a year. We all hoped Ryan had at least another month or two, and was going to get better – but I know in the back of our minds we knew what was coming.

We took him home after the hospital and just sat there and talked to him, made his as comfortable as possible, and let him know we loved him and that whenever he was ready to go back home, it was alright with us. Suprisingly, Ryan still had a sense of humor.

I told mom that I would give him his medications through his line. I wanted her to be able to focus completely on him and giving him as much love and comfort as possible, so that’s why I stepped up. His medicine schedule was 7 pm, 1 am and 7 am.
Sometime after I gave him his medicines at 1 am, Ryan became very calm and relaxed, and looked completely at peace.

You could tell he wasn’t in pain. Nor was he in anxiety. This kid had made his peace with earth and was ready to go back home. I had been a monk for three years of my life, and I remember thinking as I watched him – he looks like a perfect yogi.

A perfect yogi is someone who is in complete control of their senses, to the point that they can decide when they want to leave their body. I had seen lots of picture of these yogis and had even met one before, and I noticed they all had a certain way about them… and Ryan had the same demeanor now.

The other interesting thing was Ryan had this black mark on his forehead. When he had brain surgery a few weeks back, they had to make marks for where to cut. Well, the mark on his forehead wouldn’t come off. And it was in an interesting shape – in the form of a tilaka.

In the spiritual path I followed, we used to decorate our bodies with a certain type of clay. We’d put a marking on our forehead, and this was called a tilaka. In one of the holy ancient Indian Vedic scriptures, it is said that someone who is decorated with the tilaka mark on their forehead at death goes directly to the highest of the spiritual worlds.

Ryan had the tilaka mark perfectly on his forehead.

My mother told me to go into the next room and take some rest so I would be fresh for giving Ryan his medicine at 7 am. So I managed to get about an hour or two of sleep. During that time, I had a dream where Ryan and I were walking up a mountain. I got to the top and looked back, and Ryan was running after me, laughing and with a big smile on his face.

I went into my brother’s room upon waking to talk to him a bit before giving him his medicine. My mom stepped out for a minute. You had to do that every so often or you’d drop from exhaustion. As soon as I came in, my brother started to go. It was like he had been waiting for me.

His step father was in the room with me, and he ran back out to get mom. For some reason, I was 100% calm. I grabbed Ryan’s hand and I told him I loved him and that it was okay for him to go back home, and that it was going to be alright, that everything was going to be alright. And I meant it, too!

He quit breathing. I was still holding his hand, and was looking him directly in the eyes. I told him I loved him and that everything was going to be alright over and over again.

His eyes moved momentarily and then locked directly on my own… he squeezed my hand… and then he passed on to the next world.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw something. I look up out his window, and it had just began to snow. Big, half-dollar coin sized snow flakes, about two feet apart from each other. They looked like a million angels who were coming down to take Ryan home.

I looked back in Ryan’s now lifeless eyes and I noticed something else. For three weeks prior, Ryan’s left eye had slowly been going inward, and had become crossed. That’s one of the symptoms that’s associated with the type of tumor Ryan had.

Now, as I stared into his eyes, I noticed his eyes were perfectly straight.

I stepped back and looked at his body, and I could tell he went as peacefully as anyone could hope to go. He went as calm and as painless as anyone could go. And he was surrounded by the three people who loved him more than anything in the world, and whom he loved more than anything in the whole world.

Ryan was a very special boy. The way he left his body was so angelic, so beautiful, that it has held me together and kept me strong in this sad time.

We had Ryan’s pastor come in Saturday night when he was dying, and we all prayed. When she left, she told me she had never felt God’s presence so strongly before. Neither had I.

It is tragic to lose a loved one, especially a child. But I choose to be grateful for all that I have instead of be cross at what I don’t have. What I had was an angel in disguise for a brother. The most special person on this earth I have ever meant.

And if you ever get a chance to spend even one minute with such a special person, you’re very fortunate. I got 8 whole years – and I’m so grateful for it.

I love you Ryan.

-Jason Fladlien